Tamara, I know you know that you changed my life when you introduced this concept to me, and it never fails to bring me to tears in the best possible way. The music analogy you shared here was the most beautiful paragraph of words I've read in years. This really hit today when I needed it. Thank you - so much.
WOW!! Such high praise coming from an Enneagram type 4! And THAT brings tears to MY eyes. I adore you. Thank you for sharing your heart with me. It's always been the deepest honor of mine to walk beside you!
Thanks so much for this! This is something I have specifically struggled with in relationships and I feel like no one gives this permission in this way and I so appreciate it. There is such a difference in finding people that compliment your life versus trying to find people to complete it. We get to be a whole person already. Thank you again!
So glad it resonated! It boggles my mind how rigid my own therapeutic community can be when it comes to the subjects of relationships and intimacy. I seriously don't get how they can't see what appears to be so fundamental and obvious to me. Even worse, they pathologize it with labels like "anxious or avoidant attachments" when more often than not, in my very biased opinion, it is about navigating this normative tension in a way that works for each person/ combo of people involved.
You’ve kept my brain churning here, Tamara! Much like with any medical model, we pathologize everything, but this also keeps people “sick” and needing whatever services we are peddling, so the vast majority of folx keep coming back because our fix isn’t working in their particular situation. All that to say, both from my own personal as well as my professional life, I’ve shifted my perspective to new healthier messaging and I’m so excited!
Always thrilled to hear another professional willing to question the systems with me. In my very biased opinion, I completely understand why so many potential clients and former clients are disillusioned by our medical model of therapy and are leaving for coaching, consulting, and holistic/ alternative healing modalities. We’ve accidentally become our own codependent idiocracy I fear - we keep people stuck on the wheel of suffering and paying their co-pays - in the name of “processing” while never quite getting to the actual living part! (**disclaimer*** obviously there are awesome exceptions to this observation)
Yes!!! One day, the system and what it requires, just starts to feel wholly disingenuous. It takes expending so much energy to try to start and build rapport with new clients because of the experiences they’ve had within this outdated model. It’s doable, but insanely unfair to them to have to overcome those experiences to even get to a place where they can receive something different! Sincerely, thank you for this back and forth. I just spent 2 days on trainings with therapists who are happy to fall on what I’ve deemed the Therapeutic Dumbfuckery watchlist. It is extremely refreshing to hear from a fellow rebel!
🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼 so much this! Sometimes the therapeutic community perpetuates the most toxic ideas! I’m so glad that Kevin pointed me in your direction. You are incredible!
Tamara, I know you know that you changed my life when you introduced this concept to me, and it never fails to bring me to tears in the best possible way. The music analogy you shared here was the most beautiful paragraph of words I've read in years. This really hit today when I needed it. Thank you - so much.
WOW!! Such high praise coming from an Enneagram type 4! And THAT brings tears to MY eyes. I adore you. Thank you for sharing your heart with me. It's always been the deepest honor of mine to walk beside you!
Thanks so much for this! This is something I have specifically struggled with in relationships and I feel like no one gives this permission in this way and I so appreciate it. There is such a difference in finding people that compliment your life versus trying to find people to complete it. We get to be a whole person already. Thank you again!
So glad it resonated! It boggles my mind how rigid my own therapeutic community can be when it comes to the subjects of relationships and intimacy. I seriously don't get how they can't see what appears to be so fundamental and obvious to me. Even worse, they pathologize it with labels like "anxious or avoidant attachments" when more often than not, in my very biased opinion, it is about navigating this normative tension in a way that works for each person/ combo of people involved.
You’ve kept my brain churning here, Tamara! Much like with any medical model, we pathologize everything, but this also keeps people “sick” and needing whatever services we are peddling, so the vast majority of folx keep coming back because our fix isn’t working in their particular situation. All that to say, both from my own personal as well as my professional life, I’ve shifted my perspective to new healthier messaging and I’m so excited!
Always thrilled to hear another professional willing to question the systems with me. In my very biased opinion, I completely understand why so many potential clients and former clients are disillusioned by our medical model of therapy and are leaving for coaching, consulting, and holistic/ alternative healing modalities. We’ve accidentally become our own codependent idiocracy I fear - we keep people stuck on the wheel of suffering and paying their co-pays - in the name of “processing” while never quite getting to the actual living part! (**disclaimer*** obviously there are awesome exceptions to this observation)
Yes!!! One day, the system and what it requires, just starts to feel wholly disingenuous. It takes expending so much energy to try to start and build rapport with new clients because of the experiences they’ve had within this outdated model. It’s doable, but insanely unfair to them to have to overcome those experiences to even get to a place where they can receive something different! Sincerely, thank you for this back and forth. I just spent 2 days on trainings with therapists who are happy to fall on what I’ve deemed the Therapeutic Dumbfuckery watchlist. It is extremely refreshing to hear from a fellow rebel!
🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼 so much this! Sometimes the therapeutic community perpetuates the most toxic ideas! I’m so glad that Kevin pointed me in your direction. You are incredible!